Saturday, 18 June 2016

Waiting game

Picture from here
It's anxious waiting time at Discombobulated Towers.  I've had some of the tests at The Christie to see if I'll be able to get on to a clinical trial and so far, so good. However, I will be going back twice next week for three more tests, so it's not over yet by a long chalk.  

In the event of all being well, my first dose of the trial chemo is scheduled for 29th June, and frankly it can't come a moment too soon.  I've not had any treatment at all for about three weeks now (this is a requirement for getting on the trial) and the deterioration in my health has been pretty marked.  Added to the worsening coughing and breathlessness are pains in my back and the type of fatigue that has me wondering, in my darker moments, how I'm going to cope with the trips to Manchester or even if I'm going to be well enough to start chemo.  There is a temptation to go back to my local hospital and say give me some chemo NOW!  However, this isn't a wise option.  The local oncologist has told me that neither of my two remaining chemo options are likely to be of much benefit to me (in fact the last option has only an 8-10% chance of working).  So I'm hanging on, waiting and hoping for the clinical trial at The Christie.

I do have lighter moments though.  These include:
  • Seeing the Eddie Redmayne lookalike onc once more at the Christie and being reassured by how positive he is about the trial
  • Spending time with sisters 1, 2 and 3.  *Highlights include; discovering sis no 1 patrolling the garden at dusk, killing slugs while chanting 'double, double, toil and trouble'; sis no 2 and I buying identical handbags and walking around the local open gardens event like two Fashion Girls; introducing sis no 3 to The Sewing Bee and hearing her talk enthusiastically about pvc.
  • Watching fluffy TV, like Love, Nina
  • Watching bonkers TV, like Versailles 
  • Getting Germany in the other-half's family Euro 2016 sweep stake.  Rest assured, I will not let any winnings change me.

I have absolutely no confidence in my ability to use semi-colons correctly.  I usually avoid them but today decided to throw caution to the wind (that's the kind of wild devil-may-care person I am).  Feel free to take me to task if I have played fast and loose with this punctuation mine-field.


  1. Keep the faith, you're a winner!! 'if you have been in the deepest valley, can you ever know how it feels to be on the highest mountain' (Nixon)

    1. Thank you. I've never been called a winner before! Although I did once win a Dundee cake in the Brownies' raffle, so maybe you've got a point xx

  2. I can empathise - waiting to start a new treatment too. Not a trial but a new drug that the oncologist has to apply for. Pain is increasing and time is passing sooo slowly. But we'll get there. All the best.

    1. Best of luck with getting the new drug xx